Moments

Just when you think you are coping well...

It wasn't the little boy who made fun of Aiden when he wouldn't play with him at the park.  It wasn't the little girl who asked her mother, "why won't he talk to me?"  It isn't the fact that Aiden can play in a box or the dog kennel for hours, or sit in a pool playing with tree "thingees" for almost 3 hours.  It isn't any of those things.  The moment came shortly after Aiden and Grandma were playing, laughing, and running after each other.  He loves her.  He even says "Grandma" and runs to the door when we arrive.  He knows her home and her love for him.  Grandma was saying "goodbye" and "I love you" after a fun-filled day, and Aiden just stared straight ahead.  No expression, no smile, nothing.  My heart broke at that moment.  The feeling was so deep; I didn't even know how much all of this was still affecting me until I felt it.

Abe and I sat down yesterday and talked about Aiden for the first time.  I didn't realize how much this was affecting him as well.  I wear my heart on my sleeve--he doesn't.  My heart broke for him.  I thought for a moment I would see him cry for the first time.  I'm grateful that we can endure this trial together.  

My brother was misdiagnosed with Cerebral Palsy when he was young.  He didn't walk or talk until he was 4 years old.  My mom still talks about the  miracle when Paul WALKED into the kitchen and SAID, "what are you doing?" for the first time in his life.  That miracle will come for us too.  It may not come in one day, but it WILL come.  I have complete faith that Aiden will one day be held back only by his own desire and will, not by his inability to communicate.  

I love my family more than my own life.  I'm grateful for them.  I'm grateful that we have each other for support through the good and the bad--no matter what comes our way.