Transitions

2017 is another year of change, and I'm happily embracing it!

Abe and I fasted and prayed today about the next stage of our lives.  We've had a life changing event every single year of our marriage, and we knew this year was NOT going to be the exception.  We knew there were changes ahead, and we wanted some guidance.  Specifically, about our home.  

11 years later, we are going to sell our home.  It feels right.  After the challenging years we've faced, it feels like a healthy new chapter for us.  And change #2....

Due to our rising income, we are now obligated to pay a co-pay for Aiden's therapy.  Since discovering this, we have decided--after 4 years--to discontinue therapy sessions.  It was the right time.  Aiden's struggles continue to be academic and sensory, and I just don't feel like the hours Aiden spent in therapy were accomplishing the things we were hoping for anymore.  I'm so grateful for the first 3 years we had.  Aiden flourished quickly.  He learned to speak, communicate, and socialize through that program, and I'll never regret how hard we fought to get him the therapy in the first place.  It was worth it!  

So, we move on from after school hours and continue to work with the School District to help Aiden learn the best he can.  This month we have an appointment with the school psychologist to determine what is best for Aiden academically.  I pray that Aiden will get all the help he needs to be successful, to catch up on reading, and learn basic math.  

In the meantime, Aiden is starting to take more responsibility for helping out with his siblings, holding doors open for people on his own, and overall, being a genuinely super great kid!

I have faith as we move forward!  I'm actually really excited for what is to come!  

IEP

Well, that was no fun....

Aiden's meeting for his individualized education plan (IEP) was rough.  It is tough to see and hear that your son is falling behind, can't focus, and needs  a lot of extra help.

As I looked over Aiden's IEP notes before we started, I realized that the word autism was NO WHERE TO BE FOUND.  WHAT?!  The reading specialist didn't seem to even know that Aiden was diagnosed with autism.  "Well, that changes my expectations." she said.  Yikes.  This is 3rd grade!  How did that piece of the puzzle get missed?  He has had help since he qualified for Early Childhood at age 3--at the same school!  Not a good start.  

Thankfully, I maintained my composure and asked that Aiden receive an educational diagnosis of autism so he could get more help (thank you fellow autism mom for giving me the heads up on that!).  Aiden NEEDS MORE THAN SPEECH THERAPY!  Aiden can't read the questions well enough to answer the questions on tests, and I THOUGHT that it was set up--from last year--that he would have questions read to him.  Apparently, that fell of the radar since last year :(.  Remind me again why we do these mid-year?  Sigh.  Aiden is reading at a 1st grade level and in the 25th percentile for math and reading.  

Deep breath momma.  This boy is smart, and no test in the world is going to show that.  I do know that.  I just want to see Aiden grow, learn, and find some focus.  Would home school be best for Aiden?  I don't feel right about that, but it does seem that having more 1:1 time is what he needs.  So I'm fighting for that through the school district.  So far so good.  Here we go!  I'm hopeful for a New Year of growth for Aiden!  

Reflections of 2016

How different each passing year is....

Aiden is going to be 9 next year.  That means I've been a mother for almost 9 years!  Motherhood has proven to me that life doesn't get easier, it just changes.  I'm almost to the end of the crib/infant carrier/diaper stage of the life that I've chosen, and it feels good and right.  This year has been a year of sleep and much needed time to reflect on the challenges we have faced--and most importantly--those we have overcome.  

Abe--is in his 4th year of teaching.  When he isn't grading papers, he is busy fixing our home.  This year it was the roof, the bathroom floor, and walls.  Next year it will be new paint and a new kitchen floor.  After 11 years in this home, we hope to move in the Spring to start fresh and new.  

Marian--with her new found time, she prayed hard for the next steps in her personal journey, and the answer to that was to work on personal growth.  In doing so, I've found a program that is helping me build my fitness and nutrition business to what I've always dreamed it would be.  A place for women to go to feel loved, inspired, and to learn how to take care of themselves with fitness and nutrition.  In 2017, that dream will come true.  :)

Aiden--this is the year of communication for Aiden.  He is starting to talk about what goes on at school and how he feels about it.  We've had several moments at school this year that have left Aiden frustrated/upset with his classmates.  It is my understanding that when accidents happen, Aiden thinks he is being "bullied" and he shuts down.  From the teacher's perspective, these are completely innocent "happenings"; however, they seem to be happening often, so I'm not sure how to move forward with that (if at all).  His IEP meeting is coming up soon.   We were receiving therapy 2 days a week (the lowest we've ever had), but insurance has eliminated that option at this time.  After 3 years of full-time therapy, it kind of feels like a relief.  However, Aiden continues to struggle with peer relationships and academics as well as sensory concerns related to food.  This time, I leave it in Heavenly Father's hands.  I've fought the fight.  Now I give it to God.  I love and support my son the best I know how, and that feels like enough at this time.

Austin--has a gift for reading chapter books in 1st grade and blasting through a set of math flash cards without a problem.  He struggles with "gaming" a little too much and a strong-willed spirit/attitude that I'm not sure how to redirect.  I hope that he learns the importance of respect, hard work, and humility.  Given my experiences in life, I know our Heavenly Father will put things in place to teach him these things.

Ashton--loves to play with his brothers, to color, and to play games on the computer.  His little personality is so different from the other boys.  It is hard to believe he will enter Kindergarten next year!

Avery--seems so much older than 2!  He is one smart cookie who loves to eat, watch movies, and enjoys playing in the snow! He seems ready to potty train, but this mommy isn't looking forward to that "adventure".  Even though, being diaper free would be AWESOME for the first time in 9 years!  WHOOP!

High Hopes for 2017!  Hopefully a new home, a fresh start, and some darn good memories! 

 

UPDATE

Nutrition, Academics, and Bullies

Nutrition--this hasn't changed for Aiden.  Lunches are yogurt sticks or parmesan cheese; beef jerky or nuts; popcorn, sun chips, or graham crackers.  Every single day and night (cereal with chocolate milk at breakfast as always).  Aiden smells new foods before he eats them, then he will nibble it if it smells all right, and will nearly vomit if he puts something in his mouth that doesn't have an acceptable texture.  He still has yet to eat a fruit and/or vegetable :(.  I'm currently researching the science behind autism and nutrition for a presentation in March that I will summarize here when I'm finished.    

Academics--this remains a serious struggle.  Aiden has a hard time focusing, following directions, and learning at the same pace as his peers.  He has extra help for reading right now, and I'm happy to report he hasn't regressed!  We worked hard this summer to get him reading, so I feel good about that! As for writing and math, well, one day at a time!  Aiden is an intelligent child, but his scores don't indicate that, so we have to keep that in mind anytime there is "standardized testing".  I will not get discouraged, but have hope that Aiden will make the best out of his unique talents and skills.  After all, a strong academic background doesn't automatically mean success in the future!

Bullies--Sigh. Yes.  It has begun.  On a positive note, Aiden is finally able to communicate encounters with his peers.  Sadly, that means that Aiden comes home with stories of a friend who is not so nice to him.  Thankfully, Aiden remains his own sweet self and still seems to maintain his confidence regardless of this "friends" rude behavior.  

We move forward with faith and gratitude that Aiden is a great kid who has overcome a lot in his life!

School 2016

We are off to a rough start....

Austin was crying when I picked him up the first day of school, "I missed you Mom!"  Ashton is proving to be the "naughty" one in P4J, and Aiden already had to work with the counselor because someone told the teacher he said the "F" word and was called a "baby,"  so he shut down at school.  Aiden say the "F" word?  Ha!  That is a joke!  No way.  Now Ashton, that one I would believe!  Poor Aiden.  I'm hoping this was a just a rough start, and things get better.

Martial Arts is getting more challenging, and when that happens--as we have seen in school--Aiden doesn't apply himself.  Master Holden has offered to have Aiden test for his new belt 1:1 instead of with the group.  I really appreciate that.  Aiden had a "moment" in martial arts where he refused to work because he was upset he didn't earn his star at home (they earn stars for hard work, reading, behaving, etc. so they can earn a Lego set).  I had a discussion with Aiden about why he didn't earn his star (misbehaving with Ashton), and that it wasn't fair to be upset with Master Holden.  He apologized and we discussed what a better solution to the problem would have been.  Aiden continues to enjoy his time with Austin at AKF, so we will continue with the program until Aiden chooses not to participate.

My goals for this year are to get Aiden caught up in reading, writing, and math.  This will require a lot of extra effort on my part, which is very exhausting at the end of the day when my patience is already waning from managing a 2-year-old all day.  By dinner time I am beat!

 Somedays I feel like Super Mom from all the energy, time, and patience it takes to take care of my home, my boys, AND run a successful business!  Time management, to-do lists, and a whole lot of prayer and faith + 1 hour to myself each day seems to help me find the balance! :)


                                            
                                              First Day of School 2016--3rd Grade, 1st Grade, P4J

Summer 2016

Therapy, Martial Arts, and Summer!

Therapy--

You know the system is a little broken when your son qualifies for 40+ hours of therapy PER WEEK based on his test scores, and then shortly afterwards, loses therapy hours completely.  Three years later, and Aiden was cut off from therapy for the entire month of June.  As with all aspects of life though, you can find a silver lining--the positive side--of things.  My Dad had unexpected open heart surgery, and I took care of him for 2 weeks following an entire week of visits at the hospital.  I'm grateful we had the break.  Putting that piece back in the puzzle would have made things harder on me.  It is hard to fit therapy hours in to begin with, but adding an unexpected responsibility would have made that even more difficult.  I'm very grateful for the time I had to support and take care of my Dad.

Therapy starts again tomorrow!

Martial Arts--

Everyone said how karate/martial arts was good for kids with speech delays.  The resources I read, the doctor...so we finally gave it a try.  So far so good!  Aiden needed a little extra push to focus and practice his form, but he got a new belt!  We were referred to a great place.  Master Holden is firm but fun, and does a great job pushing Aiden to work harder.  Focus is still a problem, but he enjoys the time he spends at the gym.  

Summer--

Summer school, the splash pad, a new roof, the Angry Bird Movie, and fun with Marley--our new neighbor who goes to school with Aiden--summer is off to a great start!  Did I mention we have to fit therapy in there somewhere?  

Baptism

What a special day for our family!  Aiden is such a precious spirit, and we are very blessed that this was the perfect day for him!  We talked about living a christ-centered life today, and how many qualities Aiden already has at the young age of 8 that exemplify Him.  Aiden is quick to forgive--"It is ok.  Things happen."  And Aiden is quick to comfort. He is often the first one to ask, "are you ok?"  When a friend lost her baby, he could see the pain in her eyes, and joined me in hugging and supporting her through the grief.  We are very proud of this young man, and the person he will become!