Labels and Stats

Baby boy number 3 is almost here, and I find myself thinking...what if?

I've read some research that says the baby has a 5% chance of be diagnosed with autism (2 articles); but recently, I read 15% (Abe's school textbook that is 1 year old), and an article a few months ago that said 27%.  All of the info states that autism is more common in boys--up to 4X higher.  I wish I would stop reading.  I'm tired of the inconsistencies and theories!  There is definitely a genetic link, but an environmental one is also possible.  Many people blame vaccinations (all the research says there is no link) and chemicals in our environment (certain drugs do increase the risk if consumed while pregnant) for the rise in autism.  But some, believe it is new diagnostic criteria (the DSM guidelines for diagnosis are going to change again in 2013), more awareness due to the media, and a shift from a diagnosis of "mentally disabled" to "autism".  A friend who works as a therapist for WEAP and I discussed the labeling of such children.  Some of the children she works with she has questioned their diagnosis.  My OB/GYN also warned me about excessive labeling.  I agree.  There is such a wide "spectrum" of skills among this population.  The general manifestations are the same, yet so different.  I try hard not to get caught up in all this, but having another child with special needs frightens me a little.  I don't feel adequate NOW.  I can't imagine having 2 children who need extra help.  I hope if this does happen again, I will turn to the Lord, trust that he knows me better than I know myself, and plead for his help and guidance.  

On a positive note, Aiden is doing very well.  He is responding more and more to my words, and is starting to say "I love you" spontaneously as well as "I love you too" when I say it (which is often).  Those are the moments I cherish.  Aiden still has a hard time when he is missing an object he is set on playing with, but that is the only thing that really challenges my patience.  I continue to be very grateful for Austin.  He plays very well with Aiden, and is such a great example for him.  Ok, they fight a lot too, but Aiden needs to learn how to interact with others in all aspects of daily life.  Potty training is going better at school, but I'm having a hard time approaching it at home.  Aiden says, "no potty" when I ask him to sit on the toilet.  I don't want to force him to do anything.  Plus, I'm worried I'll get somewhere with it, and everything will be out the window when the baby comes!  I really hope both boys are potty trained by the end of this year.  I'm grateful for Aiden.  I wouldn't change him for the world.  He is such a sweet, loving boy!  I am eternally grateful for his progress!