"This will only take 30 minutes." LOL. Nope.
We are 2 months into the program, and the speech therapist just found out Aiden has autism. So much for his IEP--individual education program, right? WOW. "We should have had this conversation before he started [speech therapy through the Virtual Learning Program]." The meeting started with her intention to do further testing for Aiden...no need my friend. We already know what is going on. Aiden's brain is processing information differently.
He has autism.
What a start, and it didn't end well either. Aiden needs more help. The lessons are going too fast for him. He is learning, but slowly, and it is very difficult for him to put information together and think critically.
I'm in over my head. I feel pulled in too many directions, and inadequate in every one of them. I pride myself on hard work, perseverance, and balance in all aspects of my life, but this is too much.
If money grew on trees, I would hire a retired special ed teacher to do the 3-4 hours of work that I'm attempting to do each day. We are blessed to have about 8 hours of support each week, but I still feel overwhelmed and inadequate when it is my turn to take charge of his education. I feel a lot of guilt surrounding our 3-year-old too. He is bored and he doesn't get a lot of time with mom because I'm working with Aiden.
Then there is my job. It is so hard to build a business--that I'm super passionate about--when everything else seems to pull me out of alignment. Weekends are such a relief, and I truly can't wait for Thanksgiving!
So, I move forward praying that I can get through this year--putting Aiden back in school isn't the right thing to do, and neither is closing my business. I have to trust that it will get easier as time goes on.
I will get through this!
